You know what I love most about sixth graders?  The fact that most of the time they are funny and have no idea that they are being funny.

Example One:

I have an autistic boy we'll call Timmy.  Timmy is an adorably endearing sixth grader who wears his pants far too high and gets fixated on the oddest things.  The other day I was meeting with two other teachers after school and all of a sudden his face is in the window.

"Timmy, what are you doing?"
"Oh, being lost."
"You're lost?"
"No, I'm BEING lost."
"Oh, your planning on going and being lost.  Interesting... did you miss the bus?"
"Yep."
"Well, we need to go call your parents."
"But I'm being lost."
"Well, how bout we be lost at a later time?"

Timmy then turns to leave.

"Timmy, where are you going?"

From down the hall we hear: "To do the right thing!"

Example Two:

Assignment: Use the word "Non-Dairy" in a sentence.

Sentence Example: My friend is lac-toes and tolerant so she has to eat non-dairy foods.

::That's right.  If you need non-dairy foods, you just might lose your toes!  Beware.::

Example Three:

Miss Shakespeare: "Okay.  I need a noun."

Riley: "A unicorn that eats rainbows and poops butterflies!"

Miss Shakespeare: "ONE noun."

Riley: "Pineapple."

::How we went from our first option to our second I don't really know...::

Ah, the joys of sixth graders. We also had an excellent conversation on the characteristics of Harry Potter and how if they had been different the whole story would have changed.  My students are now certain that J.K. Rowling needs to rewrite Harry Potter where HP chooses to side with Malfoy in the beginning and joins Slitherin and competes with Voldemort to see who can take over the wizarding world first.  One student stared in to space, awed with the idea, and said "EVIL Harry Potter."

It could be genuis!!

And my class better get some credit for coming up with the idea...you all are my witnesses!  ;)

We are going to ignore the fact that an actual Eharmony employee commented on my previous blog, thus making that entry all the more embarassing and awkward.

Yep.

Ignoring...

You know sometimes I don't know why I watch chick flicks.  I love the humor and I like the romance and I love seeing a relationship actually work, but then again it is a movie and we all know that movies give us what we want to see.  But, do I really want to see that?  Because when I leave the movie theater after a seeing a chick flick my response is usually this:

"Aww, I really liked that movie.....::SOB SOB!:: I hate my life and that I am single and don't have ANYONE like that!!!!  But, the movie was really cute and remember that one part that was really funny?  THAT WILL NEVER HAPPEN TO ME!!!!  ::SOB SOB::"

Now, most of what I am saying above is said jokingly with friends, and we all laugh (har har har), but deep down (where nobody ever sees), a small percentage of myself cries one single tear of self pity...

And then I go to bed and wake up refreshed and ready to go the next day!  Woot!

Ah, the joys of singledom.

Still single and still teaching. These are facts that have not changed since my absence from blogdom. I know. I had barely even revved my engines, but this year I ACTUALLY have things to talk about that I feel are worth mentioning, now isn’t that nice of me?? I’m not just going to sit around typing and boring your eyes to death.


You’re welcome.

The topic tonight: Eharmony.

Biggest waste of money EVER.

And yet I still remain on it…

I suppose it is because I don’t want to waste my money by quitting even though I already did by purchasing. I mean really. All the good-looking men never send me any kind of communication, and I get communications out the WAZOO from men who take pictures with their cats or random stuffed animal pigs or even, yes, their mothers and you may think that’s a good thing, but not when you see how they are holding their mothers. And why would you ever, ever, EVER want to put a picture up of you as a young child in the early 80s?? WHY? All I see is your father sitting next to you and think: that is what I have to look forward to?? Yikes.

Awful isn’t it?!

And by 'it' I mean my attitude.

Call me petty and spiteful, but...

Eh.  I'm petty and spiteful.
Fact.

But, come on. If I’m going to be wasting my money I might as well be sharing the experience with the few of you who actually read this.

If any of you do anymore that is…

COME BACK! I WON’T LEAVE YOU AGAIN!!

Good news is, I have a brand new set of students this year, 76 so far, and they’ve already proven most entertaining. Between the table throwing, the tears a-flowing, and the modge podging so much in my room I literally almost passed out on a student, I think it’s going to be a productive year.

Yep.

Stay tuned.